Here are some news stories from this week that I think the mainstream media completely missed out on. All links are from legitimate news sources and not the fringe / wacko sites.

* To every man who said a woman’s crying isn’t fair… well now there’s SCIENTIFIC PROOF!!! A woman’s tears… “may temporarily lower [a man’s] testosterone level. Those tears send a chemical signal as the man gets close enough to sniff them – even though there’s no discernible odor” AH HAH!! IT WAS SECRET CHEMICAL WARFARE ALL ALONG!! I KNEW IT!! [HUFFINGTON POST]

* I’ve got an idea. Come up with a product that’s a kid’s favorite toy. Make it addictive. Make it something small enough so they can take with them everywhere. Get them addicted to the toy. Then come out with an update to this amazing product that PERMANENTLY DAMAGES THEIR LITTLE EYES. Mu ha ha ha ha!!! MU HA HA HA HA HAAA!!! Wait, hold on, what’s the goal of the evil plan here Nintendo? [NEOWIN]

* Speaking of evil plots, those “Power Balance” bracelets? The ones that are advertised as metal medical genies that will cure just about everything that’s wrong with you? Just because you wear one on your wrist? Well the company was forced by an Australian court to post on their website that…. “We admit that there is no credible scientific evidence that supports our claims and therefore we engaged in misleading conduct.” Too bad America doesn’t have strict “must be the truth” advertising standards like, oh, Australia, England, and the rest of the bloody world does. [POWERBALANCE]

* OK, so eating dead monkeys = world melting diseases, virologists are borderline mental cases, and I’m totally buying a Ploom. That is all. [THE NEW YORKER]

* NASA’s super-high tech orbital cameras are also used to detect skin cancer? Science rocks! [NASA]

* We can make rain now? For real? In the middle of the desert? Science really rocks! [TIME]

* A new finding shows that going under anesthesia is like putting your body into more of a “deep abyss-like coma” than a “restful happy-dreamy sleep”. OK, science is sometimes pretty scary, too. [SCIENTIFIC AMERICAN]

* In very serious news, police in California can now search your cell phone without a warrant. This means they get all your contacts, voicemails, call history, internet history, app use… everything on your cell phone. Without a warrant. Some “new and improved” administration this is turning out to be. [ARS TECHNICA]

* According to a secret found by Wikileaks, Israel is treating Gaza like something from the old cowboy movies. They’re leaving them in the middle of the desert without a firearm, food, water or a horse, but hey, they aren’t going to kill them! So who are the ones in the white hat again? [HAARETZ]

* The Economist has details on how to beat full body scanners at the airports! You know things are finally going to change when rich people start getting bothered and post stuff that gets poor people indicted and thrown in jail. [ECONOMIST]

* Texas is now a nuclear waste dump site? And they’re putting all the “gonna be deadly for a million-years” crap over a major state aquifer too? Dude! Even for deep West Texas, that’s not cool! [HUFFINGTON POST]

* And finally, speakin’ of my home state of Texas, Dallas busted out “Don Giovanni” at their opera house, but with palm trees, no conductor/actor sync, and “melodramatic lighting effects certainly made for what was evidently intended as a “grand opera” experience.” Ouch! Opera News magazine sure knows how to damn with faint praise!  [OPERA NEWS]